RFK Jr Blames Microplastics For Making New Barbie Doll Autistic
RFK Jr has claimed that microplastics are responsible for the new Barbie doll’s autism. “These tiny bits of plastic are…
ABC Hits Diversity Target After Appointing New LGBTQI+ Weatherman
SYDNEY — ABC has officially smashed its yearly diversity target after appointing a brand-new LGBTQI+ weatherman, who sources say “had…
PM Snags NDIS Payout After Concluding His Lack of Eye Contact with Wife Must Be Autism
In a stunning breakthrough in government-funded self-diagnosis, the PM has reportedly secured an NDIS payout after deciding his chronic inability…
Qantas Staff Accuse Albo’s Wife Of Hoarding Eye Masks And Vomit Bags During Honeymoon flight
Sources from Qantas have accused Jodie Albanese of hoarding an excessive number of eye masks and vomit bags on the…
WWII Hero Prepares Fresh Batch Of Gingernuts Ahead Of Expected Visit From UK ‘Hate Speech’ Police
LINCOLNSHIRE — 100-year-old World War II veteran Arthur Pritchard spent his morning in quiet defiance today, setting out a tray…
Police Bluff Defence Expo Protestors Into Leaving After Assuring Them The Weapons Will Only Be Sold To Hamas
Sydney, Australia –NSW Police managed to disperse protestors outside the Indo Pacific International Maritime Exposition by assuring them that the…
Gay Jewish Graffiti Cleaner A Bit Nervous On This Fitzroy Rooftop, Aye
Locals report a nervous graffiti cleaner taking his time before blasting off a giant “Glory to Hamas” mural in Fitzroy.…
Tony Burke Rejects Claims He Campaigned To Palestinian Arrivals
Labor heavyweight Tony Burke has brushed off accusations he was campaigning at Sydney Airport to welcome newly arrived Palestinian families,…
Colbert Advises Kimmel To Get Cancelled Before Emmy’s If He Wants To Win One
In a rare moment of honesty, Stephen Colbert offered some advice to fellow late-night host Jimmy Kimmel after winning an…