In a rare moment of honesty, Stephen Colbert offered some advice to fellow late-night host Jimmy Kimmel after winning an Emmy just days after CBS axed The Late Show: “Mate, the trick isn’t ratings or jokes anymore — you’ve got to get cancelled before the ballots are counted.”
The remark has left Kimmel seething, with sources close to ABC saying he’s now begging executives to pull the plug before next year’s ceremony. *“It’s not fair,” Kimmel reportedly whined. “Colbert gets cancelled and walks away with a trophy. I stay on air and all I get is guests plugging Marvel movies.”
Critics point out that Colbert’s win had less to do with comedy and more to do with what’s become known as his Trump Derangement Syndrome routine — seven years of monologues that sounded more like therapy sessions than jokes. Emmy voters, it seems, decided to give him a farewell gift for his years of shouting “Orange Man Bad” into a camera.
Meanwhile, ordinary Australians can’t help but notice the double standard: Colbert gets cancelled but rewarded, while Senator Payne remains free to drone on endlessly, spreading her decayed moral compass across Parliament like mould on a shower curtain.
Analysts say this marks a new trend in Hollywood: cancellation as career strategy. With Emmy season apparently treating axed shows like fallen war heroes, insiders expect next year’s red carpet to be full of hosts proudly clutching redundancy letters.
As one industry insider put it: “The Emmys aren’t about comedy anymore. They’re about who can get sacked the loudest.”