Melbourne Man Defecates On his lawn To Convince Intruders A Dog Lives Here
MELBOURNE — With crime still running wild in Victoria despite relaxed bail laws, machete amnesty bins and endless government reassurance,…
Sydney Confident NYE Safe After Appointing Ahmed Al-Ahmed As Both Head And Backup Security
Sydney officials have confirmed New Year’s Eve will be “fully secure” after hiring Ahmed Al-Ahmed as both Head of Security…
Victoria Apologises For Past Immigration By Taking Current Levels To Record Highs
Victorian Premier Jacinta Allan has apologised in parliament for historical immigration policies — while overseeing record-breaking arrivals today.“We must say…
PM Avoids Injury After Homeless Man Mistakes His Chin for a Turkey
SYDNEY — Prime Minister Anthony Albanese has narrowly avoided injury after a homeless man allegedly mistook his chin for the…
Historic: ABC Completes Full Hour Of Honest Reporting Following On-Air Spray From Bondi Victim’s Daughter
In an unprecedented display of journalistic integrity, the ABC reportedly completed a full hour of honest reporting after the daughter…
PM Announces ‘Stronger Safeguards’ When Issuing Guns To Known ISIS-Linked Terrorists
Following the tragic Bondi shooting, Prime Minister Albanese announced today that the government will implement stronger safeguards when issuing guns…
Anika Wells Dodges Travel Expense Questions By Flying To Maldives For ‘Heaps Urgent’ Meeting
Communications Minister Anika (Skyworker) Wells has reportedly taken to the skies once again, this time jetting off to the Maldives…
Gov Denies Fly Outbreak Linked To Surge Of Indian Migrants And French Tourist
CANBERRA — The Federal Government has dismissed growing speculation that Australia’s early-summer fly explosion has anything to do with the…
Pauline Hanson Snags $27 Million Grant After Govt Mistakes Her For ‘National Imams Council’ Rep
In a bureaucratic mix-up, Pauline Hanson reportedly walked off with a $27 million government grant after officials confused her with…
Sussan Ley Moves To Expel Andrew Hastie From Liberal Party For Wearing Hugo Boss
In what analysts are calling “the single most convoluted morality crusade of the decade,” Liberal MP Susan Ley has reportedly…