In a shocking revelation from the latest Gaza-bound flotilla, crew members insist their ship was packed with aid — but none of it made it to its intended recipients. Why? According to insiders, Greta Thunberg got a bad case of the munchies.
The humanitarian supplies weren’t just food: the flotilla reportedly carried condoms, booze, and even weed. “We had everything carefully packed for Gaza,” said one crew member. “Then Greta smashed a few cones, polished off all 200 pringle cans, and demolished 40 packs of Maltesers — everything meant for the Gazans.”
The captain, speaking exclusively to the Bellend Times, said he tried to intervene. “I thought she was just sampling,” he admitted. “By the time I looked again, the aid was gone.”
Observers note that while flotilla missions are often criticised as political stunts, this one now seems to have been sabotaged by one very determined climate activist with a sweet tooth and a penchant for recreational substances.
The flotilla crew are now left scrambling to explain to the world why Gaza received no aid, blaming the incident on what one insider called “the most effective distraction in humanitarian history.
Greta Thunberg has yet to comment.