Labor Announces Citizenships To Be Granted With All Party Donations Using Promo Code “SALAM”

CANBERRA — With One Nation’s “Fire The Liar” fundraising campaign reportedly surpassing $2.3 million, Labor has unveiled a bold new donation strategy aimed at keeping pace.
The announcement comes after One Nation’s fundraising blitz, which followed Labor appeals for supporters to donate in order to stop Pauline Hanson and her party.
Asked this morning about One Nation’s fundraising success, the Prime Minister reportedly remained unconvinced.
“Where’s the evidence?” he asked, before being shown the evidence and requesting evidence of the evidence.
Political observers described the exchange as “a brave attempt to ignore reality until it becomes more convenient.”
Under Labor’s new satirical fundraising model, citizenship applications will allegedly be processed using promo code “SALAM”, while applicants willing to promise they will vote Labor may qualify for the new Platinum Fast Track package.